On August 11, 2003, I lost my 17-year-old first-born son to suicide. It’s a tragedy that no one should ever have to go through, but I did, and I survived. I can’t think of a more painful experience for a parent than having to bury a child.
Over thirty thousand people commit suicide in the United States every year. Some of those who are left behind do not survive the emotional and psychological shock waves that follow. Some sink into depression, some see their marriages and families break up, and some commit suicide themselves. It doesn’t have to be this way.
This book recounts the details of the process my son and I went through before and after his death that took us on a path to healing, reconciliation, and peace. It is not just my story; it is his story as well. While my story transpires on this side of the veil of death, most of his is told from the “other side.”
With the help of some gifted mediums, I was able to reestablish communication with my son after he died. The “letters” and other communication received from him are extraordinarily profound in the content they reveal. They describe what goes on in the mind of some suicides both before and after they end their lives. Also revealed is fascinating content about what suicides and others experience when they arrive on the “other side.”
Through this process my son and I were carried from turmoil to calm, from guilt to forgiveness, from doubt to faith, and from separation to reunion. At various times along the way, we both had experiences that revealed the presence of a transcendent source of Divine love that dwells at the center of all reality.
I trust that this book will serve as a source of comfort to those who are going through what I went through. It is meant to provide assistance and hope to those who have lost loved ones, whether it is through suicide or any other cause. It is also a useful resource for young people to consider as they navigate the rocky waters of their teenage years.
Surprisingly, in the course of writing, I eventually realized that suicide is not the main subject of this book. My son’s suicide became a catalyst that thrust me, and him, on a remarkable journey, and it is that journey that holds center stage. It was a journey of the spirit that I think anyone can relate to. It’s a journey that began with shock, confusion, and anguish, but ended in discovery, reconciliation, hope, and joy. It’s a journey that all of us in one way or another are traveling, one that involves the search for meaning in life and that demonstrates the central part love plays in it.
Along this journey, I experienced more fully the realization that life is spiritual at its core. We are eternal beings, and this life is a natural process of preparation for the next one, the one that begins when the physical body dies. I now see death as nothing to be feared, but as a normal part of our existence as natural and as exciting as a butterfly leaving behind the empty shell of its cocoon to spread out its wings and fly.
This book will take people to places no earthly person has ever seen before, and reveal things that most have never even imagined. It is a voyage of discovery. A father and a son, separated by death, reunited by love. This is our story.